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Learning from illness

As I lay is hospital fighting for my life, something amazing happened! I started seeing what I still needed to do in life; books that needed to be written and I saw oohhhh so many books pass it overwhelmed me! All the teaching that I still needed to provide and all the talks and demonstrations I needed to give all over the world. Oh my gosh I still had so much to do! I knew then that I wasn't going to die, it wasn't going to be easy for a time but I was going to survive and get through this! After this mini life review, the medical specialist came to see to tell me that they were going to move me to the Intensive Care and call my husband. It was around 3 AM. I tried to persuade her to let him sleep (because I was going to survive and no point waking him).The specialist got annoyed and told me that she admired my positivity but it was time that I realised the situation was serious! I let it go and do not remember anything else from that fateful night. Prior to being hospitalized I had no inkling of how serious my condition was. I just thought I had the flu. Only eleven hours earlier, after being sick for days, I was crawling to my bedroom running a 41 degree temperature with a swollen and painful left foot that I thought I had sprained in my sleep (crazy I know!) As I crawled from the bathroom back to my sick bed I heard a voice shout "call the doctor now!". Knowing I was the only person in the room and having heard this voice once before I knew that I needed to listen and call the doctor. It had not occurred to me or my husband to call the doctor because I had the flu as far as we were concerned! Keeping a long story short, after seeing me, the doctor referred me to the hospital immediately. I cannot say that the last few months have been easy, there have been lots of ups and downs. I have had to give in to my desire to recover quickly and be patient, change things and cancel things but never give up! I have been frustrated with my foot, ears and especially the extreme tiredness that hits me at times but I am also feeling so blessed that I am alive and that it has happend to me (and not my children). The experience has raised my consciousness, taught me about patience and all the love that surrounds me. It has taught me to listen to my body as well as my heart. I have had to trust in the Universe just as the Spirit World showed me. If you are ever in danger and you receive a warning listen to it! Warnings can occur anytime, anywhere. Whilst changing lane on a road, entering a street on your bike or crawling on the floor at home. When its not your time to go, you will be warned! Be sure to listen and I mean LISTEN. Never say never. I could not have imagined that I was ever going to teach as my friends and colleagues know. Then a wise woman said to me "When the teacher is ready the students will appear!". I started being asked to teach. I saw in my mini review what I could do, the whisper wouldn't go away and then a few months ago I was shown a vision so I could no longer avoid it. The word School was being written followed by my name. Be grateful for what you have as you never know when it will be gone. I used to have many inner battles about going to the gym. Once I was there I would love it but my challenge was finding the energy and desire to get off my sofa and actually go there.! Now I dream of going and have promised myself not to have that inner turmoil again and just to go as soon as I can! I do daily affirmations, healings and visualisations and even act as though I am completely healthy and my foot can do anything! I am getting there. Messages can come in so many different ways. The night that I was rushed to IC a friend and colleque of mine woke up knowing that I was in a bad situation.We realised later that it was at the same time as I was being rushed to IC. Another friend and collegue had a dream about me and saw me running again, working again and that my Facebook would be working again (she did not know at the time that when I was in recovery on a new ward that I could not get my Facebook to work) This was such good proof to me and when they came to visit me in hospital it just confirmed again that I was going to be ok, with time. Streptococcus A is what I had and it hides behind flu like symptoms. 40.000 people a year in the UK die from this, I do not know how many people in the Netherlands are also affected annually, however, most people I know had never heard of Streptococcus A (Septicemia), including us. If you are lucky enough to survive, most victims of this blood poisoning I have read about or heard about have lasting damage or amputations. It started with a sore throat for me with virus type symptoms, an ear infection and then flu symptoms. It kan kill you within hours if it finds its way through your blood to your vital organs.

I wrote the above blog six months ago and I have come on leaps and bouds, including going to the gym. All my experiences have taught me to go for my dreams despite being scared, so watch this space as I had procastinated on creating Vlogs but finally made some recently and will be sharing them soon!

Much love and blessings,